The Harvest

     The past two weeks I spent in the north with Breakthrough Thailand, the ministry I connected with during my Harvest School extended outreach. They have a sugarcane field as a source of income to support the ministry, and I went to help with the harvest and just visit the people again. When I was in this village the first time and I heard about the sugarcane harvest, I knew I wanted to be in on that! How cool to start my time in the nation I'm called to, literally and prophetically bringing in the harvest! I was excited for the opportunity to help this ministry and to get to spend more time with all of them.

     My time there was so incredible, and once again God showed me how His timing is perfect. He knows how to give us only what our hearts can handle and only what our spirits need. Our hearts really are his priority, not our productivity. The first few days of my time in the village, I didn't know if I would be able to help with the harvest at all because their was an abundance of sugarcane this season and the factories were closing because they were too full. I was loving my time at Breakthrough, hanging out with the kids and having little language lessons with one of the girls, Muyong. But I couldn't help but be a little bummed at the idea that I might not be able to be a part of the harvest. And I was feeling a little bit like I wasn't being helpful enough to the ministry, just hanging around and doing dishes every once in a while when the girls weren't looking (because usually they sternly refuse help haha). Once again I was faced with that stubborn pattern I tend to fall into of feeling the need to make my time worthwhile, as if the significance of our time is measured by visible productivity. Now don't get me wrong, I'm firm in knowing that it's by our faith that we're saved and not by good works, and I know that good works are just an overflow of the love we receive from God and should never be done out of striving... But I really just love and genuinely enjoy serving in tangible ways, so sometimes I get a little antsy when I'm not doing so. God knows this, and like a good Father, He likes getting me a little uncomfortable if doing so gets my heart right. 

(Here is a photo of me and Muyong, my sweet Thai teacher and English student.)

     

     There was one day that I was getting to the point of restlessness, loving my time with these people, but feeling like I didn't want to spend two weeks just hanging out. I wanted to do something! I wanted to help! I felt a little frazzled by this, so I decided to take a walk in the fields and let Jesus sort me out. And as always, He did so with such tender love and absolutely no condemnation. His patience gives me so much comfort! Out in that field He told me all the things that I already knew, but they came straight from Him rather than my head, and that makes all the difference. I can tell myself all the right things all day long, but it won't ever change my heart the way asking Jesus to tell me how He sees things will. I just sat there in a little tin roofed hut and let Him take away all my need to "do" and let Him bring me into His complete rest. I let Him speak to me how He sees me and how He views my time here and what His idea of time well spent really is. I let Him breathe His breath of life into me that makes everything else just melt away. It was such a beautiful, needed, heart changing, purifying, intimate time with Him.

     And guess what. The very next day after He set my heart right I found out we were beginning the harvest. His timing is so perfect! So we began harvesting the sugar cane, which was so much fun! I absolutely loved it, even when it left me exhausted at the end of the day. We would work for hours and then take a break for a few minutes and rest and eat sugar cane. It was so cute the way I would be working and one of my fellow workers would tell me to come sit and rest with them. I sat in the field one day as another woman invited me to eat some sugarcane with her and I thought, "What a good Dad I have, that He would send His works-aholic daughter to a people who so value rest." Ah, we really have the best Dad in the whole world! 

The harvesters out in the field!

     I love my time with Breakthrough so much! They are a beautiful ministry, but more than that, they are a beautiful family.  They have such a cool story on how they got started and what God did with two willing and compassionate hearts. I'm so blessed to have gotten to be a part of that family, and I know my time with them isn't over. Join me in praying for the ministry, the people who lead it, and the girls who are in their care!

Jub and Cori, standing beside me, are the awesome people who started Breakthrough, and Amy, the girl sitting down, was my super sweet roommate during my time there who is a part of the ministry and also an English teacher in the village.

The mural on the side of the Breakthrough building that has their motto, "Together we grow."

     My time in Thailand so far has been full of God teaching me in unexpected ways, and lessons that I thought I already knew. It just goes to show He's never done with us. We can always go deeper with Him. Do you trust Him? You can always trust Him more. Do you love Him? You can always love Him more. Do you live in His peace? You can experience His peace even more. Has he healed you? He can bring you even deeper healing. That's the beautiful thing about God and our love story with Him- it's never ending. There's always more. We can never "get over" certain aspects of His heart. We can never know Him to the point where we need something else to explore- He is everything. He's eternal. He's infinite. And walking with Him is the most beautiful, exciting adventure I could ever dream of. 

      Now that I'm back I'm Bangkok, I plan on connecting with as ministries as possible working with men and women in the sex industry. I know I probably will be visiting slums and temples as well, but those things aren't scheduled. Also, starting next week I will be taking language classes since I know that I'm called long term to Thailand and I need to be able to speak Thai. I would love and appreciate all prayers for open doors and opportunities and also for peace in Bangkok since there is an election coming up and there have been protests. Join me in interceding for this beautiful nation that is so dear to God's heart! 

Our lives are our ministry

     One of my favorite things about all of the missionary journeys I've been on is when God shows up outside of "outreach." When God puts opportunities to share His love on our path in the mundane moments, not just when we go out with that as our intention.

      My time in Thailand with the Harvest School team was filled with those moments. One of those times was when my friend Shay and I were sitting in the lobby of our hostel just hanging out and using the wifi. We weren't even thinking, "Let's go love on people!" We were just thinking let's go chill out and talk to friends back home on Facebook. But God is in every moment. Even the silly and least "spiritual" moments, we have a river of life flowing out of us, and it can't be held back. Holy Spirit lives in us and He wants us to let Him flow out as He continually pours into us. So we were just sitting and talking and a nice English guy was sitting by us at the table. We started talking with him as well, and somehow a discussion about the difference between an American biscuit and a British biscuit turned into us talking about God for over three hours. It was so natural, Shay and I weren't even the ones bringing God up in the conversation. We somehow started talking about our time at Harvest School, discussing water shortages, differences in medical care, and even latrines. After a while of talking about Harvest School it lead to him asking us if we are "properly religious" which lead to him asking us questions about God and our beliefs for literally three hours. And he wasn't drilling us or arguing, he was simply curious and intrigued and hungry. He would ask us the hard questions that come up whenever someone thinks about a good God in the midst of suffering, and Holy Spirit guided Shay and I and spoke through us when we felt like we didn't have answers ourselves. It was just so cool the way God took an insignificant conversation about what different cultures call cookies and bread rolls and turned it into a loving pursuit of His son. It seemed like just a conversation, but it was the type of conversation God can use as a catalyst for the process of his adoption. God really is in the midst of every conversation and every moment.

      Another time was when our team spent the day going to ride on elephants, the typical Thailand tourist experience. Things like this may seem like "a break from ministry" (that sounds ridiculous to even say, but you know what I mean) or a day just for fun with no meaning or significance. But God is with us everywhere we go- so our lives are ministry! We had an amazing day doing fun touristy things. Then on the bus ride home, we heard a sweet member of the team, Debby, in the back row of the van sharing the gospel with the man next to her. Naturally all the members of the team that heard the conversation started interceding and blessing the conversation in their minds haha! And the team members who heard about it later rejoiced in the fact that God crashes in whether we're in the slums or just seeing the sights.

      Another example is my whole trip to Laos! I didn't go there with any missions plans, I simply had to go for my visa. But God had more than just a visit to the embassy in mind for my time there. Like I wrote about in my last post, my wanderings lead to a Buddhist temple where I got to just love on the monks and intercede and leave the fragrance of Jesus in that place. Another time was when I had dinner. I got food from a street vendor and ended up sitting with a man named Shaw. We didn't talk much at first, I could kind of tell he wasn't the super talkative type, but after a while conversation started. He told me about his home, Germany, and his travels and then he asked me about mine. Naturally we started talking about God and discussing the different things we believe. He told me that I reminded him of a friend he met who was also Christian. He told me they met the same way we did, that he usually isn't a talkative person, but for some reason he struck up conversation with me and his other friend. His other friend was a missionary as well and he talked about his admiration for such devotion that leads to going all over the world, even dangerous places such as where his other friend did ministry. Shaw was an atheist, but was still really interested in hearing what I believe. I didn't get into a theological debate with him, because honestly I don't have the answers to the questions that are asked in such conversations. All I could tell him was testimonies of what Jesus did in my life and what I've seen Him do in others' and why, no matter what questions come up, I can't not believe in Jesus. I've seen too much! Shaw and I talked for about an hour before we parted ways and before he left he asked if he could take my picture to remember our conversation, and I snapped one of us as well. It's incredible seeing the way God has pursued him, gently placing people on his path and nudging him to go against his normal personality and strike up conversation with them so that they will tell him about the love of God. And I'm so honored to have gotten to be one of those people!

      Join me in praying for these people and all the others that we get to share the love of Jesus with even in passing! Our lives are divine appointments for every one we come in contact with. Don't hold back what God wants to pour out through you:)

Here's a photo of me and Shaw in Laos!

     I know we give things names like outreach, mission trips, and ministry time for lack of better terminology, but in reality, every thing we do is outreach. Everywhere we step is our mission field. Every second of our lives is ministry time. There is no compartmentalizing with Jesus. He paid a high price for every part of our life! Let's give Him every moment, every breath, every part of our hearts in this lifetime! He is more than worthy of all we could ever give.

Visa runs and temple strolls

       I've been in Laos the past three days, and what I thought would be a simple trip with no purpose other than getting a visa has turned into quite an adventure filled with God's beautifully woven purposes.
        My first night here was a crazy blast filled with impenetrable language barriers, angry immigration officers, lost motorcycle taxi drivers, and this simple and often repeated prayer, "Jesus, get me where I need to be." Every time something seemingly went wrong, I was filled with peace and joy at the craziness of this adventure. The more bumps in the road, the more fun of a ride! Half the time I didn't know if I would ever make it to a hotel, but I knew wherever I ended up that night, even if I had to pull an all nighter and wander the streets of Laos, God would take care of me. The more "stressful" the situation got, the more fun I thought it was! I knew I didn't need to worry because I knew God would protect me, no matter where I ended up. What incredible freedom comes with trusting Him with every detail of our lives! And eventually I did make it to a hotel.
        Since my 30 day stamp I got in the Bangkok airport expired on Friday, I had to leave the country, but the embassy isn't open on the weekends so I got a full two days with nothing to do but explore Laos before I could get my visa. Before I came here on Friday, the friends I'm staying with in the northern Thai village thought that I would be able to get a visa at the immigration office in Khon Kaen. So, not thinking I would have to leave the country, I went to Khon Kaen without a backpack. When we got to the immigration office, I found out I actually would have to leave the country, so within in a few hours I was on a bus to a five day trip in a foreign land with nothing but the contents of my purse and the clothes on my back. Hallelujah for simplicity! It's a lot easier to find your way around a new place without a big heavy backpack so that really turned out to be a blessing. Most things tend to be better when we keep them simple: traveling, love, the gospel. God loves speaking to me even through little things like me wearing the same outfit for four nights and five days in a row!
      On Saturday, my first full day here, after a few errands like finding the hostel I'd be staying in the rest of the trip and getting passport photos, I had nothing to do but wander around the city. I was stoked about it! One of the first places my wandering took me to was a Buddhist temple that's a two minute walk from my hostel. I went in and began walking around and praying and worshipping Jesus. What a privilege to get to shine His light even in a temple built for idols! I get to go into Buddhist temples as a temple myself, a temple of the Holy Spirit, and let my praises rise like incense to my God who is not dead, but surely alive! I really believe that things like this are so powerful, even if the affects can't be seen in the natural. But I don't go in looking for a spiritual throw down, I just go in and release the Kingdom and I go in with such love for the people who built these idols and alters and brought the offerings. I really do love them so much. Jesus loves them so much!
        As I walked around, I saw a group of young monks walk by and my heart swelled with love for them. I can't even explain the love God has given me for monks. And I know it's only a tiny hint of the huge love that He feels when He looks at them, and that blows my mind. What a God I serve! I get to worship Love Himself!
        Saturday (yesterday) was so fun that I woke up this morning with great expectations for the day. And those expectations were exceeded! Once again I had a day free of plans, so after wandering around checking out bookshops and walking down new streets, I ended up going back to the nearby temple. I didn't go in with any agenda, I just walked in, sat on a bench, and began journaling. After a few minutes, some young monks walked by and sat on a bench near me. They didn't know a lot of English, but I think they were excited to practice what little they knew with me, so they said hello. Our conversation started by them asking simple questions like my name and where I was from. We continued talking with a little help from google translate, and after a while we were laughing and talking together like good friends. It started with just two guys, young monks named Bang and Daw, but after a while, a small group of their friends accumulated. After just talking for a while, it turned into them teaching me how to speak Laos! It was such a blast getting to hang out with these beautiful people and getting to learn from them and show them love just by talking with them. The temple constantly has tourists walking through, so I can only imagine that it sometimes makes them feel that they're being looked at as a part of the scenery rather than real people. So it was so nice to get to relate to these guys and see them as people rather than just another orange robe. They were such funny, lovable boys!

       It's been crazy to me how connected I feel to this country after only a few days, but God has been doing so many cool things since I got here. He's teaching me things and showing me things and putting people on my path for His beautiful purposes. What originally seemed like an inconvenient trip has turned into such an amazing blessing that is so dear to my heart! Every moment is bursting with opportunities for God's love to breakthrough, and I want to be a good steward of each moment I'm given.
      Please join me in praying for this nation and all the people I've met since I got here. Jesus loves monks, Jesus loves travelers, Jesus loves Laos!

Another day, another adventure.

"The only safe place for our hearts is to dive deeply into the magnificent, eternal, ridiculous, overwhelming love that God has for us. His love is the only safety net that will hold."

      That quote was written in a note from home that was sent with me to Africa. I reread that letter the night I first began really thinking about staying in Thailand. When I read that quote, it confirmed in my mind what I already knew- God was calling me to take a step of faith, which at the moment looked like a giant leap. And no matter how big a leap of faith He calls me to, I know that He's the only safety net I need, the only one worth jumping into. He's lead me amazingly well so far, so how could I say anything but an excited yes when I knew what He was telling me to do?
       I guess I should give some background information before I dive into what's going on in my life now.      You see, it all started April 27, 2012. That's the night I encountered who is now my best friend, sweet Holy Spirit, for the first time. It's the night I  truly gave myself completely to my awesome Daddy God. It's the night Jesus saved me, redeemed me, freed me, gave me life,  and healed me in every sense of the word. And since that night, He's taken my once meaningless life that was completely empty but full of searching, and turned it into a whirlwind of an adventure more beautiful than anything I would have dreamt of for myself.
        I could go on forever explaining details of all the amazing things I've seen God do in and through and around my life since then, but I'll try to just keep it to the basics. So I got saved the end of April 2012, then when college plans didn't go as expected, God lead me to go on a 9 month trip around America feeding and loving and hanging out with my homeless brothers and sisters. It was a beautiful journey that totally changed my life (you can read more about that on my old blog, loveworksamericatour.blogspot.com ). During that trip, I began feeling God calling me to Thailand. Once I finished that trip, I signed up for Harvest School, a two and a half month missionary training/equipping school through Heidi and Rolland Baker's Iris Ministries. When I signed up for that, I saw that there was a three week optional extended outreach to Thailand after the school, and since I knew God had called me there, I signed up for that as well.
        So on September 28, 2013 I made my way to Pemba, Mozambique for Harvest School of Missions for ten weeks of getting wrecked and healed and loved on by God as well as learning from and falling in love with the poorest of the poor in the village and the bush bush. There aren't words to explain that experience and how much it changed me!
       Then on December 11, I left Africa along with the rest of the Thailand team and headed to Bangkok. This huge and majorly westernized city was a complete contrast from the simplicity of the lifestyle of "Africa time" and sitting in the dirt we had just experienced the past two plus months. But we know that brokenness looks different in different places and people groups. Sometimes it looks like extreme poverty and hunger and trips to the witch doctor. Other times it looks like  red light areas and empty wealth and drink offerings to Buddhist shrines. So we took what we learned of sharing the love of Jesus and going low and slow and stepped into this new place as sent out lovers.
      We partnered with different ministries and did outreaches to the red light areas and slums of Bangkok as well as going to a northern village that ministers to young girls in a preventative way, bringing them into a loving family environment and sharing Jesus with them.
      After about the first week of the trip, whenever I thought about getting on the plane back to Memphis December 30 (the scheduled end of the trip) I had no peace at all. But then I would think about staying in Thailand longer, and I had incredible peace about that. I knew what God was telling me to do, but as always, the choice of whether or not I was going to follow His leading was up to me. So about halfway through the outreach, I changed my return flight to April! When I did it, it didn't even feel like there was a choice- how could I do anything but follow Him when He's proven over and over to me that He knows what's best and following Him is the best choice I could ever make?
       So here I am in Bangkok at the beginning of my time in Thailand apart from Harvest School. My time here as just begun and it's already full of God's mercy and love and provision. When I officially said yes to God's prompting and switched my flight home, it seemed like a gigantic leap of faith due to the difference between the amount in my bank account and the amount estimated that I would need for the next four months. But if I've learned anything in my less than two years of life with Jesus, it's that if He calls you to do something, all you have to do is say yes and let Him take care of the rest. Like Mama Heidi says, He equips the called. And God has made what I thought was a crazy leap of faith (silly me) in hindsight look like a tiny little step onto God's already clear cut path for my life. All the things I thought were going to be a struggle, like finding a place to live and having money for everything, have been so simple and finances haven't been an issue at all and aren't going to be. The amount I thought I would need at the beginning was so much more than what is really needed. And we got money back from what we paid for the outreach, and it was enough to basically cover my rent for my entire time here! God is such an awesome provider! I knew God was going to take care of all the details and finances, but I didn't expect Him to make it that easy! He is so good!
   What I have planned so far is in a day or two I am heading back north to the ministry that I worked with with the Iris team. They have a sugarcane field as a way of providing for the girls and supporting the ministry, so I'm going to stay with them for a couple weeks to help with the harvest and just to spend more time with that beautiful family. I plan on staying there until Kate, my friend who came to Thailand with my outreach team and is now my roommate, gets back from traveling some more through Southeast Asia. Once I'm back in Bangkok I plan on doing more outreaches to red light areas and slums, learning the language, and just sharing the love of Jesus and releasing the Kingdom everywhere I go.
   I'm so excited about this time in Thailand and all the adventures God has planned for my future. I decided to start this blog to record all the adventures Holy Spirit takes me on and all the miracles I get to see God do during my short little pilgrimage through this world. I'll be happy if this blog is nothing but a personal documentation of my time, and I'll be honored and humbled if it at all gets to bring God glory or reveals His love to anyone who reads it.
    So, to whoever reads this- be blessed and know that you are loved with an everlasting love by the God of this beautiful universe!